Because hackers have a social life too...
root@0-day~# nmap 220.127.116.11 -sV -O -p0-65535 -sT -sU -T4
So you want to know about our products, huh? Well, you
should know that all the items we sell have been personally
designed by us. Our designs
may not be the coolest thing ever but, hey, we like them
and they are what we've been able to come up with. We are
always looking for new ideas so if you have a good one or
think we should modify any of our designs, please
tell us. By the way, we don't
stock anything, our tees and hoodies are printed on
demand, just for you, everytime you order. We can do this
with the help of our pals at Spreadshirt. While this is
great for us because we don't have to keep tons of clothes
in our living room, it's a bit bad for you guys, as we
cannot accept most returns. But don't worry. If we screw
up and send you the wrong design or size, we'll
definitely take it back and get you the one you wanted.
Unfortunately, if you just changed your mind after your
purchase, we're afraid you'll have to keep the items.
We know that sucks, but that's all we can do for the moment.
Anyway, if things go well enough, one day we might be
able to build our own t-shirt factory and improve our
return policy. Until then, we apologize for the inconvenience.
Finally, you should know that we don't place any branding stuff on our shirts. We only have two or three designs that include our logo, but we remove the word "clothing" from it, so it just says "0-day", like in "0-day exploit", which is way cooler than a crappy brand name. We do this because we don't see our customers as walking TV commercials (just as walking pieces of meat willing to buy our ugly designs).
We hope you enjoy our products. Probably they won't help you meet the woman of your dreams but you'll look nice when you go to Defcon or the next local 2600 meeting.